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Post by brunneng on Jan 24, 2005 9:38:07 GMT -5
Bumper sticker: A bird in the hand makes an awful mess!  ...get ready... |
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Post by Weak4Weeks on Jan 24, 2005 16:18:27 GMT -5
A boy says...when I die I want to go in my sleep like my grandfather not screaming...like the passengers in his car. :laughing :laughing :laughing they say you shouldn't laugh at your own jokes but oh well
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Post by brunneng on Jan 24, 2005 18:03:27 GMT -5
A boy says...when I die I want to go in my sleep like my grandfather not screaming...like the passengers in his car.  they say you shouldn't laugh at your own jokes but oh well Funny! ;D Bumper sticker: Never put off 'til tomorrow What you can put off "Til next week! ...it's growing... |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 26, 2005 11:34:40 GMT -5
Three Stooges humor: Curley is about to be killed. He gets to make his choice: Burned at the stake or beheaded. Curley's choice: A hot steak is better than a cold chop! ...I know to you it might sound strange... |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 26, 2005 13:13:09 GMT -5
4th grade joke: What's the sharpest thing in the world? A fart. It cuts right through your pants without leaving a hole! :wtg ...can't get next to you... |
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Post by keres on Jan 26, 2005 14:27:58 GMT -5
4th grade joke: What's the sharpest thing in the world? A fart. It cuts right through your pants without leaving a hole! ![]() ...can't get next to you... Good one! |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 26, 2005 17:19:05 GMT -5
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Post by brunneng on Jan 27, 2005 11:08:55 GMT -5
Bumper sticker: Life is like an ocean cruise Without your sea-sickness pills! ...get ready... |
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Post by keres on Jan 27, 2005 12:17:32 GMT -5
Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office and sees The President whooping and hollering.
"What's the matter, Mr. President?" The Vice President inquired.
"Nothing at all, boss. I just done finished a jigsaw puzzle in record time!" The President beamed.
"How long did it take you?"
"Well, the box said '3 to 5 Years' but I did it in a month!"
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Post by keres on Jan 27, 2005 12:19:56 GMT -5
Saddam Hussein phoned President Bush and said, "George, I called you because I had this incredible dream last night. I could see all of America, and it was beautiful and on top of every building, there was a beautiful banner."
Bush asked, "What was on the banner?"
Saddam responded, "It said Allah is God, and God is Allah."
Bush said, "You know, Saddam, I'm really glad you called, because last night I had a dream too. I could see all of Baghdad, and it was even more beautiful than before the war. It had been completely rebuilt, and on every building there was also a beautiful banner."
Saddam said, "What was on the banner?"
Bush replied, "I really don't know. I don't read Hebrew."
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Post by keres on Jan 27, 2005 12:26:12 GMT -5
A setback in Iraqi-American relations
Saddam Hussein and George W. Bush meet up in Baghdad for the first round of talks in a new peace process. When George sits down, he notices three buttons on the side of Saddam's chair. They begin talking. After about five minutes Saddam presses the First button. A boxing glove springs out of a box on the desk and punches Bush in the face.
Confused, Bush carries on talking as Saddam laughs. A few minutes later the second button is pressed. This time a big boot comes out and kicks Bush in the shin. Again Saddam laughs, and again Bush carries on talking, not wanting to put off the bigger issue of peace between the two countries. But when the third button is pressed and another boot comes out and kicks Bush in the privates, he's finally had enough, knowing that he can't do much without them functioning well. "I'm going back home!" he tells the Iraqi. "We'll finish these talks in two weeks!"
A fortnight passes and Saddam flies to the United States for talks. As the two men sit down, Hussein notices three buttons on Bush's chair and prepares himself for the Yank's revenge. They begin talking and Bush presses the first button. Saddam ducks, but nothing happens. George snickers. A few seconds later he presses the second button. Saddam jumps up, but again nothing happens. Bush roars with laughter. When the third button is pressed, Saddam jumps up again, and again nothing happens. Bush falls on the floor in a fit of hysterics.
"Forget this," says Saddam. "I'm going back to Baghdad!"
Dubya says through tears of laughter, "What Baghdad?"
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Post by Weak4Weeks on Jan 27, 2005 13:24:33 GMT -5
Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office and sees The President whooping and hollering. "What's the matter, Mr. President?" The Vice President inquired. "Nothing at all, boss. I just done finished a jigsaw puzzle in record time!" The President beamed. "How long did it take you?" "Well, the box said '3 to 5 Years' but I did it in a month!" Funny :laughing :laughing :laughing |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 27, 2005 18:28:21 GMT -5
Bumper sticker: Papa was a rollin' stone... So I rolled him into a lake! ;D ...don't look back... |
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Post by keres on Jan 29, 2005 13:22:12 GMT -5
Kylie Minogue  ;D |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 29, 2005 16:45:33 GMT -5
Kylie Minogue ;D Which one is Kylie? ;D ...cloud nine... |
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