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Post by brunneng on Jan 14, 2005 14:56:16 GMT -5
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Post by Weak4Weeks on Jan 14, 2005 15:15:28 GMT -5
Heck, I don't want to be called all the time. It is bad enough they can reach me at home!  I like being the mystery man! ;D  ...can't get next to you... VERY good point. |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 14, 2005 15:58:20 GMT -5
You got it! :wtg Here's a good one: I was talking with a little first-grader last week. He asked me what I ws having for dinner and I said a veggie burger. To be nice, I asked what he was having and he said: "Maca-bloney and sneeze"! Too funny! You can't make this stuff up! :clapping: ...I'm losing you... |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 15, 2005 11:38:11 GMT -5
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Post by brunneng on Jan 16, 2005 11:30:45 GMT -5
Good line to use when you hear bad pick-up lines: If I wanted to hear from an as*h*le, I'd fart! :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked :shocked ...don't look back... |
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Post by keres on Jan 16, 2005 16:49:39 GMT -5
A guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her, "Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for $100 dollars?
"Are you nuts? !!" she replies, and keeps walking away. He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does.
"Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000 dollars?" he asks again.
"Listen you; I'm not that kind of woman! Got it?" So the guy runs around the next block and faces her again. "Would you let me bite your breasts
just once for $10,000 dollars?"
She thinks about it for a while and says, "Hmmm, $10,000 dollars, eh? Ok, just once, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there."
So they go into the alley, where she takes off her blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them, he grabs them and starts caressing them, fondling them slowly, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them, but not biting them.
The woman finally gets annoyed and asks, "Well? Are you gonna bite them or not?"
"Nah", he replies. "Costs too much..............."
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Post by keres on Jan 16, 2005 16:54:25 GMT -5
There's a little fellow named Junior who hangs out at the local grocery store. The manager doesn't know what Junior's problem is, but the boys like to tease him. They say he is two bricks short of a load, or his elevator doesn't go all the way to the top.
To prove it, sometimes the boys offer Junior his choice between a nickel and a dime. He always takes the nickel, they say, because it's bigger.
One day after Junior grabbed the nickel, the store manager got him off to one side and said, "Junior, those boys are making fun of you. They think you don't know the dime is worth more than the nickel. Are you grabbing the nickel because it's bigger, or what?"
Junior said, "Well, if I took the dime, they'd quit doing it!"
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Post by brunneng on Jan 16, 2005 20:49:58 GMT -5
A guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her, "Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for $100 dollars? "Are you nuts? !!" she replies, and keeps walking away. He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does. "Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000 dollars?" he asks again. "Listen you; I'm not that kind of woman! Got it?" So the guy runs around the next block and faces her again. "Would you let me bite your breasts just once for $10,000 dollars?" She thinks about it for a while and says, "Hmmm, $10,000 dollars, eh? Ok, just once, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there." So they go into the alley, where she takes off her blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them, he grabs them and starts caressing them, fondling them slowly, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them, but not biting them. The woman finally gets annoyed and asks, "Well? Are you gonna bite them or not?" "Nah", he replies. "Costs too much..............." I know that woman! She falls for it every time!! ;D ...walk you to school, my darlin'... |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 20, 2005 10:06:45 GMT -5
Today is the day! Bush has been working on his address for weeks! It is 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, George! Sigh........... ...I'm here... |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 20, 2005 11:53:14 GMT -5
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Post by keres on Jan 20, 2005 17:24:57 GMT -5
Did you know that a bird in the hand is worth two in the Bush? ...get ready... ?? |
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Post by brunneng on Jan 20, 2005 17:48:33 GMT -5
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Post by keres on Jan 21, 2005 16:49:59 GMT -5
Another great quotation from Naked Gun movies:
Frank - "Don't Worry ED This Is Not Goodbye, Its Just I Won't Ever See You Again."
;D
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Post by keres on Jan 21, 2005 17:29:16 GMT -5
From Naked Gun again:
Hector Savage. From Detroit. Yea, I remember this pug. Ex-boxer. His real name was Joey Chicago.
Ed: Oh yeah. He fought under the name of Kid Minneapolis.
Nordberg: Hey, I saw Kid Minneapolis fight once. In Cincinnati.
Frank: No, you`re thinking of Kid New York. He fought out of Philly.
Ed: He was killed in the ring in Houston, by Tex Colorado. You know, the Arizona Assassin.
Nordberg: Yea, from Dakota. I don`t remember if it was North or South.
Frank: North. South Dakota was his brother. From West Virginia.
Ed: You sure know your boxing.
Frank: well, all i know is never bet on the white guy.
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Post by brunneng on Jan 22, 2005 12:34:02 GMT -5
Bumper sticker: If you can read this... HIT THE BRAKES!!  ...it's growing... |
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